Holidays can be very exciting  for children, but also very overwhelming.    Holidays are often accompanied by many things that are new or different for a child.   New activities.  New food.  Spending time with less familiar people.  New schedules.  Travel or spending time in less familiar places.   Unclear or different expectations.  If you think of everything that may be new for a child, it makes sense why a child may become stressed or overwhelmed during a holiday.   The good news is that by being aware of the potential stresses, we can help children manage and respond in a way that helps them enjoy the holiday as much as possible.  So, how do we do that?

Manage our own expectations.

Children often sense how we are feeling and react similarly.  If we are stressed by the holiday then our children will likely be stressed, too.  As adults, we can try to be realistic about what we expect from ourselves and our children during the holiday.   We simply cannot do everything and have a smile on our face at all times.  Instead, it may be helpful to reconsider our expectations and be mindful of what holiday traditions are most meaningful and enjoyable.

When possible, include children in creating your holiday plans.

As I’ve written in previous posts, children are more likely to feel included when they are involved in creating plans.   The added bonus of including children in creating holiday plans is that they are more likely to be cooperative  and knowing what to expect from the holiday helps reduce stress.

Help your child know what to expect.

Change is often accompanied by some level of anxiety, but if we can help children anticipate what changes may take place during the holidays they will better be able to cope with the changes as there will be less surprise.   Things to consider talking with your child about prior to the holiday include:

• What holiday are we celebrating and why?
• How will the holiday be different from a typical day?
• Where will we celebrate the holiday?
• How will we celebrate the holiday? What can the child be involved in?
• Who will we celebrate with?
• Will we be traveling? How will we travel?  Where will we stay?  How long will we stay there?  What can the child bring with?
• What things (activities, food, etc) will be similar to past holidays? What things may be different?
• What types of food will be available?

Take steps to help ensure that your child is still getting as much rest, good nutrition and physical activity as possible.

Holidays tend to be times of unpredictable schedules and lots of yummy food.   And that is ok!   It is important to remember that a child who is tired or hungry may be a little more cranky than usual.   And a child who has had more sugar than usual or hasn’t had a chance to be active may have some pent up energy that needs to be released.   So, it is probably wise to look for little opportunities to help your child get the rest, nutrition and physical activity they need.

When possible, be flexible.

Holidays tend not to go exactly as planned.   And life with children doesn’t always go as planned either.   As I previously mentioned, our children sense our feelings and tend to respond to them.   If we are stressed about the schedule, then our child will likely be stressed.  On the other hand, if we can be flexible when plans change then our child may be more likely to follow our lead and go with the flow.

Allow for quiet time.

It can be helpful to take a few minutes to step away from the holiday action with your child to check in about how they are feeling about the holiday festivities.   This can also be a great opportunity to take a few deep breaths together.

Holidays can be overwhelming and stressful.   But they can also be so much fun.  I hope that following the above tips will help you and your family enjoy an upcoming holiday.  Please feel free to leave a comment with other tips that have been helpful to you and your family.

Sarah

Read other posts in the Stressors & Children series by clicking on the links below

Stressors & Children: Social Interactions

Stressors & Children: Travel

Stressors and Children